Turkey Blood Is Pilgrim For Dry Red Wine.

by Serge Bielanko

Hey. If you want, go ahead and leave a Happy First Thanksgiving message here for the very star of our tiny show, Violet. Tonight marks the once-in-a-lifetime kickoff to her very first American Holiday Season. I am extremely excited/effervescent for her too. I've been waiting for these days, pretty much all of my life. Now: they're here.

If you choose to leave a message, leave your name and maybe where you live too. Then, I'll read them all to her out loud and film her reaction (which will likely involve slobber). I'll post that little gem up as soon as she has enough greetings.

And just think, years from now, when you're in a nursing home with cranberries all over your triple chin and shirt front, and a little yam turd in your adult diaper, a grown up Violet will be able to take a break from her own Thanksgiving insanity to steal away and watch a video from long ago, when the world/you first welcomed her to the most wonderful time of the year.

EXTRA EXTRA!!!! Also: check back later tonight from wherever you are (barroom, plane, bus, your old bedroom still decorated with posters of the dorks you worshiped in Middle School still tacked to the wall) for a Thanksgiving thing I'm writing.